Vatican Edict of Alternate Religious Thoughts and Bovine

De Pope has edited this, yes he has, as he missed a couple of religions, yes, yes.

Ahhhahaha! De Pope has been inspired by a post from Colonel Colonel, WHAT?. See his post here. De Pope has decided that this model would make a good teaching sermon for the kiddos, yes, yes. So De Pope has worked on it, he is good. Any Catholic Priests, feel free to use this for your Sunday Sermon, yabango!.

You see there was this cow, yes, yes . . .

Jews

• You have a cow in your midst
• You don't think the cow is the savior because you are too cheap, and too interested in money to notice
• You don't eat the cow, because it is unclean, even though you are starving
• You whine until someone gives you land in the Holy Land
• You end up in Hell

Muslim

• You like the Cow, and the Cow's mother, but decide that a Rooster is a better choice.
• You strap bombs to the Cow, and then send him to a school and explode him
• You decide that if other people don't like your Rooster, they should die.
• You fly the Cow into buildings like a coward
• You make the Cow wear a Burka
• You end up in Hell

Christian Denominations other the Catholic

• You like the Cow a lot, and want to follow the Cow everywhere, but forget that the cow provides nourishment, and you starve on the journey.
• You send people to Hell if they don't like you particular kind of Cow you like
• You end up in Hell

Mormons

• You rediscovered the Cow in the 1800's with magic plates
• This Cow told you to have multiple wives
• Even if you accept the Cow you only have a 130,000 in 6billion chance of Heaven
• This Cow was made up by a crazy man, so, your religion is fake
• You end up in Hell

Wiccans

• You forget the Cow is there are you are too busy looking at the field, the Flowers, The Trees
• You end up in Hell

Buddhist

• They Cow is unimportant
• You take the Cow and put him on a seesaw, and attempt to balance the seesaw with the Cow's dung.
• After you kill the Cow, he will come back as a mosquito
• You meditate on the Cow, yet do nothing
• You end up in Hell

Hinduist

• There is no Cow, but there is a dragon, a elephant, a snake, a donkey, and so on
• You have a fake Cow, which you won't touch
• When you kill that Cow, he becomes another Cow
• You would never think of eating the Cow
• You end up in Hell

Scientologist

• You don't have a Cow you have Han Solo
• You need to pay a lot of money to visit with Han Solo
• You really like bad science fiction
• You end up in Hell

Atheist

• Cows don't exist and the one before your eyes is a fake.
• You end up in Hell

Agnostics

• The Cow is there, but the Cow is too complicated for your simple mind to understand.
• You end up in Hell

Humanists

• Cows are just cows
• You end up in Hell

Catholic

• You love the Cow unconditionally
• You partake of the meal that the Cow offers
• You partake of the special events the Cow throws for you
• You are blessed and Heaven Bound.

As you can see, De Pope has a point, that I hope is not lost on the Kiddos, no, no

Peace out, De Pope is Audi 5000.