So De Pope was tagged by
Malach the Sausage Sucker, oh yes he did, but not in that way to perverts, yes, yes. He needs to play this stupid game, but De Pope has decided to turn the tables on that Sphincter Stretcher. He will give you 7 secrets, but not ask others to do that same, no, no, I only ask that you go to confession and confess you ghastly sins, anyone who reads these word, COFESSTICATE! You can confess in my comments section and De Pope will pass judgement, Zowee.
Also, De Pope has started a blogroll, and De Pope has decided to add anyone who posts at De Pope blog to that list yes, yes. I also found out Malach works for a Catholic Charities Organization, guess who's getting fired on Monday . . .. SHE BOOM! Yes, yes.
Listen, do you want to know a secret?
1. De Pope was not born to as you would call Parents. God just placed De Pope on Earth, BAMF, smoke, he was there. He placed De Pope in Germany, knowing what was going to happen a few years later, yes, yes. De Pope could teach the German People, and at the same time help to wipe out the dirty Heebs, yes, yes. FIRE! De Pope taught the blessed Aryans about the Almighty Lord Jesus, Praise Jesus! It is all in the Book of Herepedes, yes, yes
2. De Pope has blessed the beer, De Pope has blessed the beer, Hi Ho the Derio De Pope has blessed the beer, GLUG. You see, this is the true Blood of Christ, a nice tall pilsner. What you are confused, yes you are. God, is a beer drinker, Jesus drank wine because between you and me, he was a bit of a, how you say? Metrosexual, yes, yes. This embarassed God a little bit, and gave him a little identity crisis, as we all know Jesus and God are the same being, yes, yes, but different, true. Well De Pope has a mission from God to restore the true blood of Christ to it's rightful place, at Mass. Rattadingdong! Yes.
Oh, and none of that Guinness Garbage made by those Mick Demon Spawn, no, no. If you want steak, cook a steak. Dummy.
3. Jesus was never married, he was too interested in himself. Look how he took over the Bible. Everything is Jesus this, and Jesus said that . . . would a guy like that ever get married, no! It is good though and all part of Jesugod's plan . . . Yes.
4. Masturbation will really not make you go blind, grow hair on your palms, or kill angels . . . you like that one, yeah, we made that up just to screw around with your head, yes, yes. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, joke is on you. Abortion on the otherhand . . . tsk, tsk, tsk.
5. Santa Clause is real. It is acually De Pope flying all around the world on Christmas night bringing joy, like Jesugod would do. We have been doing it for centuries, yes, yes. De Pope loves to give out his BRATZ dolls, and Dr. Dreadful Gooey Food Lab and new Underoos to the kiddos, yes, yes. ON VIXEN WHIP CRACK, ho ho what a imagination you humans have.
6. You all know De Pope likesa to rock out to de Punk music, but here is a secret, De Pope is also big fans of his buddies, the Geto Boys . . . Damn it feel good to be a gangster! Yes, yes, word to your mother. Don't make me pop a cap in your ass, hehehe.
7. 7, the Holy Number, bow your head and pray
Holy Number 7, please protect us from 6. Join with 8 to eat 9. All Mighty
Jesus of the 7 heads, please defend your people of the lowly number 5, with you laser eyes, and fire breath. We worship the 7, the number of Jesusgod. For now, and forever.
Amen
In the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, go in
peace.
That is the Popes special blessing for my readers, yes, yes, maybe you will make De Pope's blogroll? Bye.
Labels: De Pope's Life