• Posted on: August 14th, 2008
  • By: crag

A Much Needed Break

I’m on vacation next week. I really need it. I’m not going anywhere, just getting the house into gear. My Folks & Little Brother are coming up to bring some furniture since they are downsizing. Right now we have an empty house. I sort of like it like that. We have so much room, I don’t want to fill it up with stuff. So I’ll be taking a break from blogging. Also next week, I have a doctor’s appointment with another ultrasound. So we’ll see if AG is feeling prudish again.

In the meantime get to know these Hotties.

13 Comments

  • Posted on: August 13th, 2008
  • By: crag

ICE CREAM TRUCK!!!

Fucking Shit!  There’s an Ice Cream Truck that goes down my street every evening.  It brings back all the memories of my childhood & the neighborhood kids & my siblings chasing down the Ice Cream Truck Man.  This is so sweet.  I don’t even care for ice cream, but my 20 lb turkey & I were running down the street to catch up to the truck.

ICE CREAM TRUCK!!!!!

11 Comments

  • Posted on: August 12th, 2008
  • By: crag

The Ever Expanding Cunt

So I’ve exploded. My stomach has exploded. It happened over night. I feel like I’m bread dough that has risen. I know there are people out there who say, “Pregnancy is sexy.” Not when it looks like a watermelon is attached to you. Maybe if you are into the pregorexics thing you don’t have a watermelon. Just in a day I popped. When I was meeting the new neighbors, I mentioned I was pregnant & I was not wearing a loose shirt, they said, “I couldn’t tell that you are, congrats.” Two days later a 20lb turkey is inside of me. What the hell happened?

11 Comments

  • Posted on: August 11th, 2008
  • By: crag

Chaos surrounds the Cunt

So we have moved in thanks to our friends & my mother-in-law who helped me clean out the old apartment. Now things are in boxes & I don’t know where half my crap is. Also we have really nice neighbors who came over to introduce themselves & were talking about how more & more young professionals like ourselves are moving in. Our dog has an enemy next door. He’s a border collie. When she goes out on the porch & he’s out in his backyard, they stare at each other & the back of their hair sticks up. They don’t bark or anything at each other. They just stare. It’s funny.

Anyway, so back to moving day.

Moving day started out like a herpes outbreak. You see we don’t have a lot of stuff especially big heavy stuff like furniture. We only have a queen size bed (box spring & mattress) & a futon. The rest of the stuff we were not taking because we mainly got it from other college students leaving it on the curb when they were moving out. So we didn’t think we needed a U-Haul truck for our stuff. I called Enterprise if our queen size bed & futon would fit in one of their cargo vans. I also get a great discount at Enterprise because of my work. So the Enterprise Guy assured me it would, so I said to myself “Titty-sweet! This will make life easier”. Well it didn’t. The box spring wouldn’t fit. I called the Enterprise guy to tell him. He was apologetic, but he didn’t have anything else. I called the other rental places, U-Haul & Budget, & they didn’t have the size of truck available unless we wanted a giant one. Meanwhile when CockMaster & a friend was moving something else in the cargo van he turned his ankle. If any of you know the history of CockMaster & his ankle he has a bad habit of turning it when he plays basketball. So his ankle is a size of black & blue baseball.

TITTY-SWEET MY ASS!

So we debated about what to do with the box spring. CockMaster was thinking he would rig it somehow blah blah. I see this as more trouble than what it’s worth. I also saw this as an opportunity to get a platform bed that I’ve always wanted. The mattress was able to get into the van so we would just get a platform bed & NEVER EVER have to worry about the damn fucking box spring. CockMaster at first didn’t like this idea, but as the pain in his ankle worsen he thought I was brilliant. OF COURSE I AM, just ignore my spelling & grammar errors. The box spring is sitting on the curb as I type unless someone picked it up. So on Saturday we got everything out. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate our friends’ help. It made the horrors of everything so much better. On Sunday CockMaster, my Mother-in-law who came into town to see the new house, & I returned one last time to clean out the place. I have this habit that I want to be alone when I’m cleaning out an apartment we’ve lived in. So my Mother-in-law helped out with the bathroom & after that CockMaster & her left. I finished up the vacuuming & some other minor stuff on my own. It’s a catharsis to be alone in a clean empty apartment. I was so busy with my tasks at hand that it wasn’t until CockMaster said in his sentimental way, “It’s sad to leave this place. This is where we made AngryGinger.” I of course ruin every sweet moment & said, “If you are the daddy.”

13 Comments

  • Posted on: August 4th, 2008
  • By: crag

Calm Cunt

I feel like I’m some type of broken ABBA record that I keep saying how much shit is going on right now.  Surprisingly I’ve been really calm.  I would normally be a Negative Nancy or Worrying Willy.  Instead I’ve been just a Calm Cunt.  Poor CockMaster has been really stressed about the uncertainties of the future such as the results of the bar exam.  I know it’s a man thing to think he has to support the family totally on his shoulders only, but we are in this together & when the results come in three months from now, we’ll deal with the good or the bad.  Financially I’m not worried.  Money is only money.  It is gained.  It is lost.  I think we should just be happy that we have our health.  Our baby is healthy.  Tomorrow could kill or injury us all.  Cocksucking Tomorrow sucks!  So I don’t know if the pregnancy hormones mellows me out or what, but I’m not fearing Tomorrow.  It takes too much energy.  Hell with the way the economy is going we should be glad we have jobs.  With the way the environment is going we should be glad we still have air to breath & water to drink.  I just hope CockMaster will not worry so much about Tomorrow.  Whenever he does I make sure he puts his hand on my belly & the baby kicks him.  Good baby.

17 Comments

  • Posted on: August 1st, 2008
  • By: crag

Now I can put my sex swing up.

So we have closed on our house & the keys are in our hands.  Yesterday was an exhausting day.  Now I feel fine & we have to move all of our shit.  I will be out of commission for most of the month of August.  With moving & some other things that’s going on with work I’ll be in & out.  Just know that I’ll be swinging.

15 Comments

  • Posted on: July 31st, 2008
  • By: crag

Rants: Laid Back Attitude & Olympics

One of my problems with folks in this region is their laid back attitude.  I’m not some aggressive Yankee who talks too fast & doesn’t take time to say hi, but I do expect people do to their jobs without me having to check up on them.  My first encounter with this laid back attitude was almost three years ago when CockMaster & I moved up here & we were going to a furniture store because we didn’t have anything to sleep on or sit on.  We called the furniture store to see when they closed so we wouldn’t get there after that.  They told us it was “hot” so they were closing early.  HOT!  What the fuck you mother fuckers?

You don’t know hot.  This is not hot.  South Carolina is hot & humid.  This heat & humidity is nothing.  Closing the goddamn store down because it’s a little warmer than normal pissed me off, because we had to go to WalMart to buy one of those cheap metal black futons just so we could have something to sleep on & sit on.

Anyways, I have encountered this laid back attitude on several other occasions, but when it comes to the closing on our house I don’t like things taking last minute.  For example the home insurance guy’s fax was malfunctioning so it took a while for that to get through.  I don’t care scan it & email it.  WHAT?  You’ve never heard of such a thing.  PUNCH IN THE FACE!  Mortgage lender lady should return phone calls to the closing agent before you go out of town.  PUNCH IN THE FACE!

I know it’s not that bad of an issue.  One of my co-workers’ closing was delayed because her lawyer found a $5,000 discrepancy.  Meanwhile the moving truck was waiting in the drive way at the new house.

This has been a very stressful week not only did CockMaster have a marathon of ass ramming exam,  I had to call around to check up on people making sure they are doing their goddamn titty sucking jobs, & I’m not even getting into the stuff that’s going on at work because there’s too much to talk about.

Do your fucking job!

——————————– —————————————————-

OLYMPICS

I don’t care about the Olympics.  I don’t care about the personal stories of how the athletes have overcome obstacles to reach their dreams.   I don’t want it on my tv.  I don’t want the pre-trails on my tv except WOMEN’S BEACH VOLLYBALL.

I like to watch that.  I like Misty May & Kerri Walsh.  I have no problem if that was the only sport played during the Olympics.

7 Comments

  • Posted on: July 29th, 2008
  • By: crag

CUNT POWER

UPDATE:

This makes me not stress about CockMaster.

Today & tomorrow CockMaster is taking the bar exam.

I’m sending him all my cunt power for good luck.

15 Comments

  • Posted on: July 28th, 2008
  • By: crag

Dear AngryGinger,

You tell me what you don’t like by angrily moving & kicking. You tell me what you do like by happily moving & kicking. If I’m sitting in a certain position or after my pregnancy pilates, you angrily kick informing me that you don’t like those things. Chinese food makes you kick happily as if you are dancing. You also like milk & grapes. You do not like veggie burgers. You stop moving as soon as your SpermDonor puts his hand on your roof. SpermDonor says he has a calming effect or you think someone is trying to rob your house by going through the roof so get really still ready with your taser gun to stop any robbers.

I just want to let you know that I’m still amazed that you are here. I promise I will only traumatize your life a little. I can’t vouch for your SpermDonor on this one.

8 Comments

  • Posted on: July 26th, 2008
  • By: crag

Back off my name motherfuckers

When I was five weeks pregnant CockMaster & I decided on our names for AngryGinger. I was surprised we were able to find names that we both liked since we have very different tastes. CockMaster is traditional. I like uncommon names such as Bjorn & Inga. One day there will be Bjorn Rag Master & Inga Rag Master. For now we are going with family names in honor of a great grandmother/great aunt & our grandfathers who have passed.

So when celebrities start using one of our names or a variant of it as middle names it pisses me off. Nicole Kidman & that guy she’s married  named their daughter Sunday Rose. Yes I read the article & I know that Rose is apparently a family name, but I don’t care. Why can’t celebrities just keep with Coco, Apple, Kiwi, or some other shit like that?

Back off Nicole Kidman! Then I saw that one of the Dixie Chicks just named their daughter Harper Rosie. GOD DAMN IT!!!

So note to all celebrities & anyone else naming their babies stay away from:

  • Rosa Louise ( I was thinking Rosie as a nickname.)
  • William McNeal (Mac will probably be a nickname. That’s what everyone called my Grandpa since McNeal was his surname.)

AGAIN BACK OFF MY NAMES OR THE WRATH OF CUNTRAG WILL BE ALL OVER YOUR ASS!

14 Comments

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