Sad News About the Angry Piper.

It has come to my attention that the Piper has been involved in a terrible shaving/masturbation accident that has resulted in all of his fingers and penis being cut off. Sadly, due to the very cheap health care plan that he was forced to sign up for under the new Mass Healthcare law, he was required to go to a New Bedford hospital to get them reattached. The doctors there accidentally mixed up the appropriate locations for all eleven digits during the operation.

Since his recovery, no one has been able to persuade him to come out of his room and actually start posting something on his website again because he is too busy obsessively sucking his new "thumb".

Our thoughts and prayers are with him, and we hope he overcomes his latest tribulation and pulls himself together to actually do something with his life again.

Hopefully, the Astroglide I poured all over the new vibrating keyboard I bought for him will make the transition easier.

We can only hope.

15 year old kid performs surgery

And he doesn't even have a degree or a permit!

His parents made him do it despite the fact that they are both docters.
This is what happens when parents want their children to over perform.

Read the whole story there
http://in.news.yahoo.com/070621/210/6h822.html

I'm sure our young Doogie Howser's parents won't be smiling for long.

The 10 Commandments of Driving

Thouest shall not raiseth Middle Finger . . .
The Vatican has just released a document called the Guidelines for the Pastoral Care of the Road, also known as the 10 Commandments of driving. I list for you below.

1. You shall not kill.
2. The road shall be for you a means of communion between people and not of mortal harm.
3. Courtesy, uprightness and prudence will help you deal with unforeseen events.
4. Be charitable and help your neighbor in need, especially victims of accidents.
5. Cars shall not be for you an expression of power and domination, and an occasion of sin.
6. Charitably convince the young and not so young not to drive when they are not in a fitting condition to do so.
7. Support the families of accident victims.
8. Bring guilty motorists and their victims together, at the appropriate time, so that they can undergo the liberating experience of forgiveness.
9. On the road, protect the more vulnerable party.
10. Feel responsible toward others.

They also suggest doing things like reciting the rosary while you drive. I don't know about you, but I would find that VERY distracting.

I am Malach and commandment number 11 is: Keep your windsheild clean, or the Angry Piper will clean it for you.