Some devestating news for the WoWees
The Angry Veteran has died.
Breaking news for CNN.com, The Angry Veteran was killed today by a sniper, on the steps of New York City Federal Court, just before his trial for refusing to register for the Superhero Registration Act. The Sniper was thought to be Palmer, but it tuned out not be, and he got away
After 60 years of fighting Nazi's, Communists, and crazy German's with Red Skulls, The Angry Veteran's shield has been broken. His young boy love Bucky was so distraught he could not even answer questions.
The Veteran, also known as Steve Rogers, surrendered to police several months ago after refusing to register for the Super Hero Registration Act, enacted after a out of control powered being caused a major catastrophe. Superheroes since have been split, with Rogers leading the dissenters, and Cap'n FlackPaperPants representing the those for registration.
It was a violent end for America's hero.
The Angry Veteran first strapped his sheild on in 1941, entering WWII with the US, and because of his actions, Germany and Japan were defeated. He then established a Jewish home state in the Middle East. He then went on to fight in Korea, Vietnam, The Falklands, bring down the USSR in the 80's, and finally, personally hang Saddam Hussein. He was a symbol of America's strength, and it strong Lawful Good alignment.
"The Modern World and it magic technologies were foreign to the Veteran," stated anti hero Malach the Merciless. "I mean the man could pound down Caffeine Free Diet Coke and foot stick of peperoni, but text messaging was foreign to him. He was a good Ninji though."
Sometime villain, sometime lush, The Angry Piper was deeply saddened. "The Veteran and I, we spent a lot of time together. Yeah, he took out my Greg Brady Replication Machine; man did that piss me off. But we were like one, we even shared women, sometimes minutes after each other."
Crazy Mad Scientist Dr. Mantodea agreed. "I used to make all these crazy inventions for him, like bomb filled back packs he could spray from his wrists, shit that no one in his right mind would try . . . and you know what, he always took them out to fight crimes, and never complained."
Dr. Murk, Roger's lawyer, made this statement outside the hospital " . . . he will be sorely missed. He was fun. Remember his Dragon Eel phase? It too bad some many of his war buddies died at the hands of villians, in bizarre ways. YOU COMPLETE ME!!!!"
One person though seemed to relish his demise. "That fool Rogers, he deserved it. He was a FAG! He didn't represent America, not like me," Mitt Romney yelled out from a bullhorn to a crowd of Turbates at UMASS.
Cap'n Flack for once could not be reached for comment
For continued following of these events as they unfold please go to our subsidiary, CNN.com
I am Malach, and today is a sad day, I poured a 40 for the Veteran



17 Comments:
Marvel is dead to me.
Hey, your supposed to be dead! Of course, this is comic books we are talking about.
"Cap'n Flack for once could not be reached for comment" ...
No fucking way, I can't believe it!!! *giggles*
Malach sneaking in the little digs when he can get them.
It's okay, I have a few back-up copies of him too.
So, Malach...
You advocate euthenasia for veterans.
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